Occassional Topics

By Dr. David E. Arredondo

The Flaming Hysteric

3382506686_caba3e4321_oYou all know who I mean. It’s the woman—who no matter what—has to be the center of attention.

Her dress may be a little tight or short. She flirts incessantly. Her neckline may be a little low, or her breasts pushed up or surgically enlarged to a degree guaranteed to get men’s attention (which she might complain about). The slightest little incident throws her into a histrionic. She is vivacious, easily enthusiastic, very emotional, and dramatic. Her car is probably a flashy color (she’d get a convertible if she could) and designed to draw attention.  Read the rest of this entry »

The Corporate Culture Reconsidered:

corpcultureEveryone Can Be Replaced

Over the years, as a clinician, I have noticed a syndrome that has emerged in persons of both genders and all levels of the corporate ladder.

This syndrome is of gradual onset and is barely perceptible at first. It is only at middle age and beyond that its signs and symptoms begin to emerge. There seems to be a gradual process by which the employee of the modern American corporation gradually assimilates and acculturates to the workplace, which may oftentimes become the center of their life, psychologically and emotionally. Read the rest of this entry »

Minding Your Mind: Anger and Frustration

Too much negativity and anger will affect every aspect of your life – including your business, your health and your relationships.

Therefore it is critical to break habitual reactions that serve as kindling for the fire of anger and other negative emotions. Although they accurately delineate the problem, most “anger management” courses fall short of long term efficacy because they do not address the Tonal in the entirety of its interdependent parts.
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Guilt and Shame

Many think that guilt can be fixed with punishment. The problem, though, is when you try doling out punishment to yourself – using your own mind.

If this self-inflicted punishment were a one-time thing – if you simply noted your mistake and moved on, having once been guilty but now truly wiser – a little guilt can go a long way. The problem comes when this kind of self-punishment becomes a habit. A “mind rut” of constant self-deprecation can be harmful, as it tends to stick around long after it’s served its usefulness.
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Walking in Light

“Walking in light” is a metaphor for a state of being that is probably most accurately described as being in a state of grace. Walking in light is different for different people in different circumstances.

For the ancients, a state of grace was being in accord with The Way, Buddha, nature, Atman, What Is. In the Abrahamic traditions (Judaism, Christianity, Islam), it would be called walking with God, being filled by the Holy Spirit or being in communion with Christ. In this state there is no conflict between the heart, mind, body and soul; or, if there is a conflict, it is apparent, external and inconsequential. The observer, the true self, sees reality just as it is. In this state there is a sense of awe, wonder, gratitude, and boundlessness. The conflict is minuscule in comparison.
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Attunement

There is a particular type of grin an infant gives that adults literally cannot resist. The grin is contagious – before long, the adult is smiling back and then making funny faces at the child, who smiles even more broadly and gurgles out that particular set of sounds we all recognize as the laughter of a baby. This laughter has such an impact on any remotely conscious adult that even their slightest smile turns into an open laugh, until finally the adult breaks into a full blown set of sing-song sounds, which invariably evokes squeals of joy from the infant watching and listening intently while never moving his eyes from the fascinating creature in front of him.

What is remarkable here is the delight, the universality and uncontrived nature of this simple scene. But something miraculous occurs while we laugh and play with an infant.
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Starting With The Small

It is when you are confused by the different (and sometimes conflicting) messages you get from your heart and mind that it is most difficult to observe the difference between your thoughts and feelings. In learning to clearly recognize what your heart and mind are saying, you must also be able to differentiate them from the mental content or thoughts with which they become confused – especially in a mitote.
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